In no particular order here's a list of things to do and places to go for the Columbus Day holiday otherwise known to West Indians as Miami Carnival.
 
Perquisites:
  • Transportation: Reserve your rental car early, else you not getting one, or at least not the one that you want. Include GPS whether you know Miami or not. Venues change and others are in "Quite-O Quite-O"; we still don't know where "Quite-O Quite-O" is!  Trust us, it's well worth avoiding the frustration of asking Cubans for directions. Don't try to save money and roll with people, you might end up home watching plenty Telemundo.
  • Accommodations: We recommend staying with a local friend. Better lime, more information and less likely that you will end up sleeping away.
  • Duration: Thurs night to Sunday night at a minimum. But Wed night is building up nicely.
  • Mas: Organize a Carnival costume for Sunday's parade. As always, earlier means getting the costume of choice.
  • Health: Walk with an extra liver!!

Tuesday/Wednesday: Yuh early!! Options are South Beach (enjoy de water) or under populated soca parties at odd night clubs. But, Wednesday night starting to build nicely with Bacchanal Wednesday and Socavivor series kick-off.
 
Thursday: TRIBE Ignite - Miami. Everything you expect from TRIBE; sweet woman and hype DJ'ing. Bring money for drinks. If you looking for live performances, Girl Power is the way to go! Then hit up annual Miami Rise meets Shine NY to keep the vibe rolling straight til like 2pm on Friday.
 
Friday: For de South Florida vibe, Scruples Block-O is guaranteed free drinks and free bamsee to wine on till LATE, do NOT miss this Fete. Alternative is Black and White, also bananas, also free drinks. Afterwards, (bout 4-5am) go Socavivor's Int'l Flag Night with Machel - Insomnia type vibes. Still in seach for live performances? Then check out Glow Miami or Soca Gold.
 
Saturday: Find yourself in a Breakfast Party. Pending your vibes, affiliation or loyalty, either de "Original" or de "Official" Red Eye Breakfast Party. This part is important, afterwards go home and bade and be careful about taking a five's. Day Fetes is where you recuperates; not watching Telemundo. University Fete have mad performances.  DV8 and Miami Fly Girls/TAO have best food and drinks. You're probably going to have to pick, so text de gal/fella you were wining on last night to see where dey going. Tons of night fetes to chose from. Our pick is F.R.I.E.N.D.S. for intimate vibes. But both Gen X Cooler Fete and Island Elite's Big Phat Fish have nice vibes!! For massive crowd and live performances, go to Machel Montano Concert (HD Miami or Alternative Concept MIA) or Cooler Fest (CDC & Associates - same folks that use to do the Convention Center fete).
 
Sunday: Be on de road early. 1-2 o'clock is too late. If in Miami Carnival, play Mas with Generation X. China Mas is another big band, and from what we see, Vibrationzz have some pretty, pretty dolly in de band! For Broward Carnival, jump with Mascots International. Also, One Island Body Paint Band is huge and full ah fun! If you're not sticking around to enjoy the post Carnival concert (which is great entertainment), go home when it get dark!
 
Monday: A few Las Lap fetes .. but nothing to risk losing ya job about if you lied to your boss and called out sick. Catch that flight home!!

Disclaimer: Professional and experienced TJJ Fet-a-lot-athon® Party Gurus have rigorously tested these Carnival grounds and are providing said recommendations based on the fundamentals that the audience is a healthy rum drinking islander. If while performing any of these actions you begin to feel any dizziness, fatigue or pain please stop and consult your physician immediately.

TJJ Fet-a-lot-athon® Party Gurus

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